I'm A Beauty Queen, Damn It!!: My Bloggers And Tiaras Entry Post

MomDot.com is having a Blogger Beauty pageant and I'm entering, damn it!

**I am beautiful! I am beautiful!**

I figure that I won the Mouthiest Blogger Award, so I am on a roll. This will not be a traditional "Beauty Pageant", though. Of course when is anything Trisha and that group does traditional? You will likely see some wacky and weird posts {Well wackier than usual, anyway} over here at The Asylum.

But fear not, it does not mean I have finally gone completely over the edge {I like teetering on that ledge. It keeps me on my toes.}. No it only means that I have to follow the rules if I want to win. And I do want to win. There is a great prize involved and it will be mine, all mine. Without further ado, here is my initial entry into Bloggers And Tiaras....

1) Name, Blog Name, Twitter:

Name: Shan

Blog Name: Last Shreds Of Sanity

Twitter: @babyrocasmama

2) Have you ever entered a pageant before?

No

3) Do you have any special talents we can look forward too?

Yes, I have many hidden talents. Some are suitable for broadcast, others are not. I can do things with my toes that defy what is considered normal human physicality.

4) Name your top 5 favorite sites to visit on the net..no, you do not get brownie points for putting MomDot.

Top 5: Jeannie's Happy World, Bee and Rose, The Bloggess, MomDot.com, Post Secret, Fail Blog

5) What is your favorite thing to do when you are not blogging?

Not that I ever leave the house or get to do any of these things but if I did get to do something other than blogging, I would be doing at least one of the following:

Shopping, reading {A real, adult level book. With no pictures or pop-ups or rhymes} and playing with my 4 year old daughter. I also enjoy crafts {I make holiday wreaths and dream catchers} and sex {with my Husband! Get your minds out of the damn gutter!}.

6) Whats your dream vacation?

My dream vacations: #1 is a Jamaican beach with my own cabana boy. Dream vacation #2 is a leisurely trip to Ireland. Dream vacation #3 is to Alaska or some other far North destination during Winter so I can see the the Northern Lights in person.

7) What blogger do you look up the most too?

The Bloggess {Sorry, Trisha}. I want to write like her. I want to have her wild abandon and ability to make a hilarious, well received blog post that is essentially about nothing. She's like the X~Rated Seinfeld. She's my girl crush.

8 ) If you could be on the cover of any magazine, which would you chose and why?

Vogue because I want to show all those girls and women with low self-esteem that you don't have to be built like a 2 by 4 to be considered beautiful and intelligent. I want to prove that all those models they beat themselves up over because they will never look like are airbrushed and don't even look like that in real life. It's all an illusion. Real women are beautiful and come in all shapes and sizes.

9) Tell the truth…you want a tiara, don’t you?

You're damn skippy!! Of course I want the tiara. Why else am I entering this pageant and subjecting myself to Trisha's devious and likely embarrassing tasks? For my health? Uh, no. I want bling bling, baby!

10) What is your definition of blogger success?

A faithful readership, a few good friends made, a little recognition for your skills and a bit of dough on the side.

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I'm A Beauty Queen, Damn It!!: My Bloggers And Tiaras Entry Post

https://damnvoicesagain.blogspot.com/2009/11/i-beauty-queen-damn-it-my-bloggers-and.html

Just Another Wordless Wednesday...

This is just a little slide show of our Halloween that I put together. I had so many pictures, I thought it would be easier and look a whole lot cleaner if I made it into a video, that way my post wouldn't be 50 miles long.


I also made a video of The Diva trick or treating. I really love Windows Movie Maker {It's likely the only thing I will ever love that was made by Microsoft. Vista, anyone??}. I feel like my videos are so much cooler using that program first than just uploading them raw to YouTube. Enjoy, my friends.

For more Wordless Wednesdays, please visit MomDot.com, The Mud Bug, Ordinary and Awesome, 5 Minutes For Mom, Potamus Prefers, and WordlessWednesday.com {HQ}.

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Just Another Wordless Wednesday...

https://damnvoicesagain.blogspot.com/2009/11/just-another-wordless-wednesday.html

Asylum Tutorials: How To Follow A Blog...

Do you know how to be a proper blog follower? Most of you do. Unfortunately, many others do not. Being the follower of a blog is like being someone's friend; there is a give and a take, but no demands are made, save for respecting one another.

There is a curious phenomenon in the blogosphere that makes seemingly normal {I use this term quite loosely} people believe that your blog and it's content are dictated by them. I have heard from several bloggers about how they have gotten nasty emails and/or comments demanding to know where their certain post is or how the author cannot write about certain subjects because it's not what they like to read about. Each time I hear about this, the demands have gotten more brazen and ridiculous. Color me gobsmacked. I have yet to have this happen to me, but I am sure at some point it will.

And I will tell them exactly this:

This is my blog, not yours. I write what i like. I decorate my sidebars how I want and I have it designed the way I want it to look. If you want me to write a certain way about certain things, then it no longer is my hobby or fun and has now become a job. With rules, restrictions and deadlines. Therefore, I should be getting a paycheck for doing this.

Of course, I am always up for making extra cash.

The fee schedule is as follows:

1) Posts about my daughter $675

• Videos add $195
• Pictures are $10 each

2) Posts about my Husband $65

• Rants are an extra $25
• Intimate details add $150
• Pictures are $10 each
• Videos add $1000

3) Posts about politics or current events $175

• My political views add $50
• Posts about the other party $300
• Pictures are $10 each
• Videos add $300

4) Sarcasm is $600

• Humor add $250
• Pictures are $10 each
• Videos add $200

5) Posts about my crazy Mother $450

• In~Laws add $250
• The Free Range Stupid/Rednecks add $300
• Pictures are $10 each
• Videos add $300

6) Advertorials $100 {This will only be copy and paste, no creative content}

• Videos add $50
• Pictures add $10 each

7) Reviews $300

• Videos add $75
• Pictures add $10 each

I will also require a blog redesign monthly by the designer of my choice. My PayPal is babyrocasmama@hotmail.comThis e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it .

Payment is required in advance of writing the post. Article will be published when I have time. Payor will have no editorial rights.

~*~*~ OR ~*~*~

This is MY blog, Not yours. Until you pay me the big bucks, I will write, post and do what I want. Go ahead, stop following me, I care not. This world in general, and the blogosphere specifically, would be a much better place if you would get off the "net entirely and get a real life.

Go on now...GO!

To reiterate, the proper way to follow a blog is to read the author's posts, comment genuinely, even if your opinion is different than theirs, be respectful and REALIZE IT IS THEIR BLOG NOT YOURS.

I hope you all learned something useful today. Thank you for reading and for your understanding of my unique brand of sarcasm and craziness.

Want To Read More? Go -->>

Asylum Tutorials: How To Follow A Blog...

https://damnvoicesagain.blogspot.com/2009/11/asylum-tutorials-how-to-follow-blog.html

Shan's Week ~ End Wordles

Welcome to another edition of

You can go get your own copy of Shan's Week~End Wordles button here.


OK for any newbies, go here to get instructions on how to participate {I even added a video tutorial for those of you who are still confused} in Shan's Week~End Wordles and please also grab a Shan's WEW button to post on your site so you can easily link back to me and the game.

This week's Wordles

My Wordle

Happy Halloween!


My Blog's Wordle

Wordle.net

Don't forget to leave a comment after linking and make sure you visit and comment on everyone's Shan's Week~End Wordle posts.

Now go get all those Wordles posted and...

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Shan's Week ~ End Wordles

https://damnvoicesagain.blogspot.com/2009/10/shan-week-end-wordles.html

Happy Halloween 2009

I hope you all have a happy and safe Halloween.

I will be praying that the Sheriffs Department really does do the extra patrols I had to ask for because the little shithead who vandalized my lawn {because I told him and his friends to get off of it} also threatened to break into my house on Halloween {See pic below video}. That's a real nice boy his parents raised, dontcha think?

Thanks to Victoria {@happysquid} for sharing the link to this video. Enjoy!

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Happy Halloween 2009

https://damnvoicesagain.blogspot.com/2009/10/happy-halloween-2009.html

Playing Dress Up And Steaming Up The Bedroom: MomDot's Small Talk Six

Those MomDotters are at it again...Small talk Six! On Saturdays.Today’s topic is "6 costumes that you think would be fun for the bedroom". You can answer this with a list of 6 words, 6 phrases, 6 sentences. 6 paragraphs, 6 photos, 6 videos, etc...

Here ya go...

1) A pimp and a Ho {Him being the Ho}

2) Santa and Mrs. Claus

3) A brick and a brick layer

4) A Dominatrix and her SlaveBoy

5) A champagne bottle and a corkscrew

6) Mary Ann and The Professor

Well, THAT was interesting...

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Playing Dress Up And Steaming Up The Bedroom: MomDot's Small Talk Six

https://damnvoicesagain.blogspot.com/2009/10/playing-dress-up-and-steaming-up.html

Just Another Wordless Wednesday...

At the Pumpkin Patch. We had a lot of fun. But we did not buy a pumpkin there, they were way too expensive. We went to Stater Bros. and got it for less than $4! At the pumpkin patch it would have cost $15 for the same size one.

Would you like a pumpkin or a gourd?

Then, of course, my Husband had to end the evening with some silliness...

For more Wordless Wednesdays, please visit MomDot.com, The Mud Bug, Ordinary and Awesome, 5 Minutes For Mom, Potamus Prefers, and WordlessWednesday.com {HQ}.

Want To Read More? Go -->>

Just Another Wordless Wednesday...

https://damnvoicesagain.blogspot.com/2009/10/just-another-wordless-wednesday.html