Saturday, February 7, 2009

Things That Go Through My Head

My mind is a vast, twisted place, filled to the brim with bizarre thoughts. I decided I would share some of them with you.

Now that we have President Obama and his promise of a transparent government, does that mean we are finally going to find out the truth about Area 51 and that crash in New Mexico?

Why is there a pair of panties, but just one bra? Aren't there two of them?

If life is like a box of chocolates, why doesn't mine have a caramel center?

Why did they do a remake of Friday the 13th? The original sucked. Does no one have any original ideas anymore? What's next? Prom Night or A Nightmare on Elm St.?

If men are from Mars and women are from Venus, where the hell is my ultra cool purple and silver sparkly spaceship? I want to go home...

The only difference between the races is that some tan better than others.

If you talk to God, you're spiritual. If he talks back you're crazy. Why? Don't we all want our questions and prayers answered? Wouldn't that also require actually hearing or seeing the answer?

My daughter would make Super Nanny Jo Frost break out her pimp hand.

The more you resemble a crack ho, the more famous you become...just look at Amy Winehouse.

It seems that the level of craziness is directly proportionate to the amount of personal wealth. By that standard, why aren't I a billionaire by now?

I want to find a way to wireless connect my brain to the new post area of my blog. I always get really cool ideas for a post, but I inevitably get stopped or redirected on my way to the computer. By the time I do finally get there, I've lost the thought. This way it will go there automatically so I can evaluate it later. It will also save me time trying in vain to retrieve those particular thoughts from my crazy, addled grey matter.

{These were retrieved from my noggin. Sorry if they scared you}
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ChicagoLady said...

You should get one of those digital recorders and keep it in your pocket. When you have an idea for a post, record it, then you can listen to it later when you are in front of the computer.

I don't think your thoughts are any more twisted or bizarre than the rest of us, lol.

Mel said...

anyone of those thoughts would make an awesome blog post!! Thanks for taking me on a trip through your brain!!!

Mel said...

anyone of those thoughts would make an awesome blog post!! Thanks for taking me on a trip through your brain!!!

Bee and Rose said...

What?! No random Rick Springfield thoughts floating around in there??? I love this post! High five on every single thing!

Hccm said...

This post was way COOL!

Hugs and Mocha,

Missy said...

"Some tan better than others," that is hilarious!

Cassie said...

George Carlin (may he rest in peace) would be so proud of you!

Court said...

I like the connect the brain to new post idea, that is so up my lazy alley!

LadyStyx said...

Very funny post!!

Young said...

I love you blog. It's really good for me. I wish I could get crazy like this. Keep up the good work, good luck and wish you the best. :D

Queenie Jeannie said...

You're so silly! I love your thoughts!!

(ohmygosh...does that make ME crazy too???)

H.E.Eigler said...

yours is the kind of crazy that I like...1 part spunk, 1 part 'oh no you didn't' and 1 part smart. Don't ever change Shan.

kasandria said...

Love it! Some of the things almost seem like they come outta my head. Thanks for sharing and not being afraid to be yourself!


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